STABLES OF COMO, SOUTH YARRA: Not even sure where to start. We decided to come after seeing beautiful pictures of its surrounds, a seemingly appetising menu, and recommendations from friends. Hidden down Como Avenue in South Yarra, this 19th century mansion was converted into a function space and restaurant, which is called The Stables. Needless to say, the estate featured a Victorian-style, white mansion, surrounded by a measly garden rolling down to the Yarra River (or more so the busy road that runs along side it).
After a quick walk around, we were glad to enjoy some a light afternoon tea between the two of us. It was a pretty hot day so we requested to sit inside where the aircon was basically non-existent. It was closer to 2 pm on a weekday so not many tables were filled. The mercury was just over 30 and we decided to cool down with the Tickled Pink fresh juice, and one of the “sangers” called Pony Club.
For an $8 juice of watermelon, strawberries, rose, mint and coconut yoghurt, we were expecting a towering long glass of pure tropical bliss, with each sip to sweep away our sweaty selves. The result? A tiny baby glass of dilute watermelon juice. The size was disgustingly stingy – something a person could finish in 2 gulps NO JOKE. Gobsmacked by the size, we gave it a chance and thought perhaps the blend of fruity freshness would wow us. No such luck. The juice was at best a bit of watermelon, coconut yoghurt and water… super dilute, not even that cold and probably one of the most pointless $8 I’ve ever spent in my life. I’m not a big fan of mint so it was okay that I couldn’t really taste it but where was the rose, the sweet strawberry and the invigorating watermelon?! At least they made the effort to dash some coconut around the rim to make up for its lack of everything else.
Now the pony club sandwich, with smoked chicken, cream cheese, bacon, tomato and baby spinach. Once again, Como strikes with its stingy portion control. For $15, we barely got 2 pieces of Coles homebrand sliced toast. The bread was dry, with barely enough cream cheese or tomato to provide any source of moisture. With no additional sauce, the sandwich was basically a few slices of seemingly store bought chicken ham and bacon placed on top a piece of spinach and tomato. Pretty much I’ll teach you how to make one for 10 times cheaper and probably tastier too.
The only upside to this catastrophe was that the outdoor seating did look very aesthetically pleasing and the service was polite. Not many brunch places are located in a garden with nice, elegant white seats and tables to dish off a sophisticated, picnic vibe. But in our case, it was too hot to sit outside anyway. Tbh I really regret picking this place over an extra scoop of Gelato Messina just a stroll away on Chapel Street…
SHOULD YOU GET FAT HERE?
No – An overpriced place for the horrendous quality and portions of food they offer…